Waiting for change.
“There is nothing permanent except change.” Heraclitus, quoted in Lives of the Philosophers by Diogenes Laertius.
It’s pointless to resist change, it happens around us – most often without us even realising – and before we know it things/people/life is just different. As enduring as change is, it’s always been a challenge for me to deal with. Not the incremental stuff, but the big things that loom or are dropped on top of us suddenly. Whether we’re powerless to do something about it, or we’re the ones making the choices that lead to change.. well, that shit can be pretty tough.
I have changed a lot in the past 15-ish years. I can see it clearly in hindsight, but it wasn’t really obvious to me at the time. The changes that were “Big Things” were always the ones I had to have a very present part in – changing my direction in tertiary studies, changing my life to become vegan, changing from a stable life to uprooting to move overseas to see where that took me, and even more than this. I was so afraid of it all, but none of it turned out for the worse. I wish hindsight had me better prepared for change as it comes up now, heh.
Life this week has been a hovering mess of impending change – I can see all of it will be for the good, but the waiting to see the outcomes has me completely on edge. I’m changing part of my life to move on from a place that’s been very emotionally draining this year. I’m waiting on a change in my status from visitor to permanent resident. Soon we’ll (hopefully!) change from a regular couple to dog parents (yay!). I can’t guarantee when much of it happens, but I look forward to that tipping point where the waiting is behind me and the benefits of change will be reaped.
I feel like bookending this with another quote from a famous philosopher will help sum up where I’m at this morning:
“Ahh, the waiting game sucks. Let’s play Hungry Hungry Hippos!” – Homer (Simpson)